I'd rather Christmas shop than Church shop

While talking about Christmas, a co-worker mentioned she needed to find a church for a Christmas service. And instantly I felt anxiety. “Me too.”

‘Church shopping'. Blah. It’s weird for someone who has been intensively involved in ministry.

New observations:
-Greeting time is just plain awkward. Well intended people. But for a stranger, it’s still weird. And think of all the germs spread by shaking hands!
-I notice the music. I can’t help it. Is there a ‘good hearted’ vocalist, without much vocals? Or sensitivity to flow. Do we sing the same song for 10 minutes?!?!
-I think of the service order- wondering why they do things certain ways- flow of service etc.
-I browse through the bulletin- wondering if they threw something together in Word or if they took the time to custom design a beautiful hand-out.
-I notice the lighting. Are they a BRIGHT sanctuary church, or an intimate low lighting church.
-I notice the people. Hands up. Hands down. Frowns. Smiles. Interacting. Parents handling kids. Pastors in the front row.
-I carefully observe tithing time. What’s said. How it’s done.
-I listen. Scriptures or just stories. Deep or surface. Challenging or safe. Solid or mystical. Relatable or unattainable. Dry or refreshing.

It’s exhausting. I told Jake, before we commit to another church and set our roots deep, I want to meet with the pastor. I want to know the ‘real’ stuff behind the platform on Sundays. What would I ask?

What’s the function of the elders or church board?
How are big decisions made?
How do you share your financial health with the congregation?
What’s your involvement in local and global missions?
Tell me about your staff (full-time, voluntary etc?)

Yes, I know this seems like an interrogation, but to be honest, every person has to a right to know these answers. And I want to avoid the pain, like we’ve experienced, of rooting deep for 15 years in one church to realize the fundamentals are too ‘off’ to stay any longer. It hurts. So instead of 'shopping' based on Sunday morning feelings and assumptions, I’d prefer to know the philosophy, heart, and priorities in a church right off the bat.

Call me crazy…

Days of our Lives does NOT disappoint!

Don’t judge me. But last week’s Days of our Lives episodes were so good! And today’s was just as satisfying! This is very exciting, considering one of the story lines is about a secret that has almost surfaced for almost a year. Good grief. So here’s a glimpse …

EJ and Nicole


Nicole was pregnant with EJ’s baby, but she lost the baby and faked her pregnancy. She bought a baby from a pregnant teenager, Mia, but found out that EJ’s ex, Sami, was pregnant with EJ’s baby. So she schemed and managed to arrange that Sami gives birth at a particular clinic where Nicole bribed the doctor. Nicole helped deliver Mia’s baby in the same clinic, so Nicole with the help of the doctor, could swap babies (lucky for Nicole, they were born the same night. Go figure). Sami didn’t know Nicole even knew about her pregnancy (Sami was in the witness protection program- so no one knew she was pregnant but her new boyfriend Rafe, the FBI agent in charge of protecting her)- but of course Nicole had found out. So she carried out this plan. Unfortunately, Sami’s baby (who really was Mia’s baby) died. (Sidnote: Mia started dating Sami’s son, Will!) Finally, after secrets unraveling, lies getting bigger, and suspicion growing, people found out Nicole never was pregnant. But people assumed it was Mia’s. BUT THIS WEEK Sami finally found out that her baby did NOT die, and in fact is the baby Nicole’s been toting around as Mia’s. *sigh* (in the midst of this Sami’s boyfriend, Rafe, put together the pieces, solved the mystery, was almost assassinated by EJ’s father who found out about the baby swap and didn’t want Sami to know, and did a DNA test to prove Sami’s motherhood).

Sami and Rafe


Ej doesn’t know yet.
Sami just told Nicole she knows the truth.
And hell is breaking lose.

How exciting!
(I said don’t judge…)
PS Nicole's super pregnant in real life. Ironic.

numb arm creates havoc.

Imagine having no feeling in your right arm. That means you can't lift it. Move it. Nothing. Then imagine, for some bizarre reason, you had to keep that right hand elevated above the height of your heart at all times (as if never wanting blood to flow to it).

To do this, you'd probably have to use your left arm to secure your right arm on your chest (but above your heart, remember)- almost as if you're making your right arm give you a pat on the back! But your right arm is heavy, and won't just stay there on it's own... so in one quick movement you place the right hand above your heart and then reach for it's elbow to support it's weight. Ahhh... it kinda looks like you're cradling a baby on your chest- but it's your own arm!

Maybe I lost you. (I got lost myself). But this was the scenario last evening and this morning with Jake's arm- which we describe as a heavy log attached to his body that we had to lug around. Yes we. There are some things I had to assist with... logistically.

His surgery went well, he hasn't felt a lot of pain but it presented other unpredictable challenges- like babying his right arm. To avoid swelling, we have to keep his hand elevated at all times. Even during sleeping. We had a few falls- but his arm remains intact with his body and nothing is gushing blood! So we're just glad he can't feel anything yet (although it's been regaining feeling all day).

All is well. The next few days will be rougher, but we'll survive. It's kinda good practice, if you think about it. He has to hold it, nurture it, and not let it fall ALL DAY LONG. Kinda like a baby :)

Jake's Hand Surgery

In the midst of preparing for a baby, studying to get his insurance licenses, gearing up for a new job, making some life changes, anticipating the busy holiday season, finishing up the hunting season, and everything in between, Jake is having major hand surgery on Thursday.

At his pre-op appointment today, we learned that the surgery is a bit more 'intense' than we had anticipated. He has a torn ligament (from high school days), and if they can't manage to stretch it back to it's intended position, they'll graft some tendon from the underside of his wrist and use that to heal the ligament in this hand. Meanwhile, the bones rub together and have been unstable for some time, so the surgeon is also pinning Jake's bones in place for everything to heal properly. This means, for 6-8 weeks, Jake will have exposed pins coming out of his hand, which will be in a soft cast for the first 2 weeks, and then a hard cast for 6 weeks. Meanwhile, his new job (insurance) starts Dec 9th and he still needs to pass his licensing tests before then.

You can imagine the stress that poured down this morning on the two of us while we drove away from the specialist's office. But we're fortunate to have health care, supportive friends and family, a new job on the horizon at all, and time for Jake's hand to heal before the baby arrives. (The surgeon warned he can't pick anything up for 6 months. Which lands us in April- which is when our baby is due. Jake BETTER be healed by then! He's not off diaper duty!)

So if anyone wants to come over and do the laundry for me, dishes, bathtubs, anything at all, let me know! Because for the next few months, Jake's off the hook!!!

Praying husband. Sleeping wife.

In the middle of last night, I remember Jake trying to wake me up. I was completely annoyed, batted away his snuggle, and fell back asleep.

This morning, as I was getting ready, I heard Jake toss in bed. “I couldn’t sleep last night,” he said.
“I KNOW! You tried to wake me up!”

But he corrected me. “I was just trying to pray for our baby.” Evidently, Jake put his hand on my tummy in the middle of the night, when he couldn’t sleep, to pray for our growing child. And I, in return, nudged him away.

Oops!
What a sweet dad-to-be.
What a cranky sleep-hungry mom-to-be.

Beavers Football Game

Rita (mom-in-law) was lucky to have generous friends to grace her with 4 tickets to the Beavers (Oregon State University) football game Saturday.

So Jake, myself, Rita, and Jake's friend Ethan drove down to Corvallis to watch the game. We got fried chicken, jojos, and chips along with Rita's fabulous no-bake chocolate cookies and home-made carmel corn. We sat in a VERY COMFORTABLE skybox, with our own bathroom! And our view was spectacular- centered on the field.

Thank you Rita (and the Austins) for a great game day!


This gesture was new to Rita and I, but we caught on quickly. You pump your arm toward the direction you're wanting the ball to go, and grunt at the end. Ya... we got in the spirit...

Halloween... Boo

I don’t like Halloween. I don’t like how girls dress in ‘costume’- when did costume turn into ‘sexiest outfit’? I don’t like holidays where decorations include blood, dead people, and spiders. I don’t like grown teenagers going trick-or-treating like they’re still 5.

I do like seeing little ones dress up in tasteful costumes. I like that people open their doors and give treats to people they may not know- because it’s fun and festive. I like themed parties and reasons to get together.

So overall, I don’t like Halloween.
But I love seeing cute kids, creative costumes, and potluck food.

AND it means we’re closer to Christmas…
Oh boy!